Turkey Wrangling

I am determined to have a big, fluffy Thanksgiving this year. The hubs and I have gone a little overboard inviting people. He because he wants to fry turkeys, and I for many reasons some conscious and some unconscious. 

The main dilemma seems to be coming up with a suitable activity to fit the outrageousness that I feel. Personally, turkey wrangling seems to fit the bill. I can see people in jeans chasing a turkey around my backyard falling in the mud, shouting obscenities at the turkey, rolling around laughing, and people cheering from the porch. It's beautiful! 

I was slightly disappointed not to be able to find any pictures of anyone ACTUALLY wrangling turkeys by hand. But apparently, it is not for ordinary folks.

When we lived on our 3rd floor apartment we had the Great Pumpkin Toss of '06 after dinner. 

Ideally we could repeat this, but even if we got on the roof what would we be aiming for? the dumpster in the apartment complex was perfect. Sigh. I have gotten some suggestions, but most lack the OOMPH of fun and unforgettableness that I am trying to achieve. Call me modern, but charades just doesn't do it for me. 

There is a possible option of turkey bowling. One of the local bowling alleys sells old pins 10 for $5. We could do a small turkey or chicken to stay cheap. S and I are still trying to work out the logistics. For example, are the neighbors going to be down with this? It also seems to be mostly in places with hard-packed snow. 

I did find an interesting article here which talks about the various types of turkey bowling. My favorite is the third type of turkey bowling. It reminds me of the hind-and-go-seek we used to play in Walmart in college:

The last and final style is the rogue "Grocery Store Turkey Bowler". This menace to society will set up soda bottles,(or any other bottles he/she can get their hands on) in an empty grocery store isle. This method usually involves an accomplice to watch for store employees, and another to shoot video while the bowler pitches his bird down the makeshift lane. It's not likely you will get a full 10 frames in the store. Usually it's pitch and run before you hear "Security in the frozen meat section".

Apparently Texas has a long history of turkey bowling if you would like to see George Bush turkey bowl while governor you can do so here.  It seems I am just gathering more and more evidence to talk myself into this turkey bowling. :)  I'll let you know how it goes. 

My Intervention

Let me introduce to my pretty sister, S. She owns several make-up bags, has filled at least one standing jewelry chest, and can carry off sequined trucker caps because people are mesmerized by her eyelashes. Oh, and she's a guera. And lucky for me, she likes to stay with me when she's in town, dress me, and make me look nice. (I just typed nice, but pronounced it nyyyyce in my head)

So, meet S....

So, for my birthday this year my fabulous sister bought me Bare Minerals. Which I was worried about, since makeup application is really not my forte.

In true infomercial fashion I decided to take a poorly lit, sans makeup, non-smiling, unpleasant photo of myself. It then took me a month to get up the nerve to post in on the interwebs.

This is a picture of getting started, before the wreckage occurred. Lucky for me, it comes with a video that I watched while applying in my guest bathroom since the hubs was still asleep. Note: Bare Minerals comes off computer keyboards with a little spit on the finger.

Here is my after picture. I took it next to a window, from up above, and tried Tyra "happy eyes". You see, I am smiling with my eyes just like Tyra tells all the girls to do.

So, in true Clark howard style I will say that I have been wearing the make-up for a month and I like it. I am almost down to my other makeup speed of application. I still use other concealer for bad spots, but I like the softer, younger look it gives my skin. Also, it was free since it was a gift, and so therefore a great buy! Thanks, S!